i'm sorry i was rude before but its difficult for me to express myself when im on the verge of exploding in my pants

thats from anger management dude.

i don't really do pick up lines but i found this one hilarious and added it to my facebook....“I’d like to check you for ticks” -Brad Paisley

yes i know. hilarious movie.

ya it was good

one i overheard once, my face leaves in 5 minutes be on it

guy: did it hurt?
girl: what???
guy: when you fell from heaven

its worked for me, scary as that is, once i was thrown a curveball after tossing that out there...

me: did it hurt?
girl: no you caught me
me: :blinks in shock:

...that was a good night

haha YES!!

"is that a mirror in your pocket? cause i can see myself in your pants!"

''i lost my number...can i have yours''

''those pants look pretty tight...how do you get in them''

(unzip)
''its not gonna suck itself''

does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

Guy: If you didnt have feet, would you still wear shoes?
Girl: No!
Guy: than why are you wearing a bra?

i think you missed a word or two, because that makes no sense.

I had this pulled on me and Bigrocsfirebird was there for this

"I have something in my eyes I cant stop looking at that I really like"

did you **** her?

"Am i going to be your midnight kiss or is it going to be that guy" (points to old, weird looking drunk)

got some milf to make out with me on new years eve with that one

not bad...I like the one squirrel said. But the Cheesesteak line has gotten teh woman...go figure

Yeah i ****ed it up oops. It was late! lol. edited

this thread is sad

no your just mad cause you have to get women intoxicated before you can make a move

+1 on that. ive asked girls for their numbers and ive given mine to them. it has worked well for me. the way i see it, its a 50-50 shot. either they say yes or no. be confident but not cocky.

pepper spray?

a little cocky is good as long as you don't come off as an *******.