your writing is amazing
i liked this line the best:
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The only kind of suicide hotline you would find would be some guy answering phones, saying ‘do it’, then hanging up.
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that made me laugh. i agree some of the warning labels are freaking retarded! i saw this one on a website that has all these dumb warning labels: Do Not Turn Upside Down. (this was on the bottom of the object, i forget what it was) like you said if your too damn stupid to know that coffee is hot or that water and electricity dont mix, you should die... i dont agree that disability should be eliminated because there are some people that truely need it, the claims should be read better and the recipients should be chosen better.