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04-02-2005, 09:31 PM
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#1
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13 Second Club
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Netcong, NJ
Posts: 5,799
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You Might Be A Ricer If...
Found this on the web. Got in a good laugh.
YOU MIGHT BE A RICER IF...
...you find yourself using the excuse 'yo, but you gots twice as many cylindas, du' after EVERY race
... you drive a 4 door 'type R'
... your gumby pants make it hard to shift
... more than 20 of your mods involve sheilding whats actually underneath
... you have stickers that even most asians don't get
... you have stickers for parts you dont have
... you refer to 50hp as the 'big shot'
... your car has so much camber it can drive on its side
... when you drive by, WWII veterans run for shelter
... your exhaust tip diameter is 4 times the inner muffler diameter
... you have 'power by' anything anywhere on a car made by the engine manufacturer
... birds make nests on your spoiler because its taller than the trees
... you sell crack for the image...not the money
... you have 'N/T' polished on the side of car and you dont know what bracket racing is
... you will only race if the other guy removes four sparkplugs
... you can't race uphills
... you have "All Motor emblazoned on your rear hatch right next to your 15.50 dial in
... you brag to have nitrous and have a 14.50 dial in
... your exhaust system for your 1.8L is bigger than most Pro-stock cars
... you spent more money on stickers and stripes than your parents paid for your car
... you go to a performance shop and immediately start rummaging through the decal bin
... your tach is bigger than your head
... you have a shiftlight and your car is an automatic
... you refuse to race it at races because it's a show car and at car shows you refuse to show it because it's a race car
... your only mods are cut factory springs and a chrome exhaust tip
... at Autocross events you don't participate because you have a drag race setup and at drag events you brag about kicking *** on the autocross.
... you have more lights on the front of your car than the USS Voyager
... you brag about a turbo kit that never seems to get installed.
... your exhaust sounds like a dying Moose
... your bright green $300 air filter is bigger than your engine.
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2019 Toyota Tacoma TRD Pro ... M6, Voodoo Blue Fun Machine
1987 Pontiac Trans Am ... 305 TPI, T5, Project Car
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04-02-2005, 09:47 PM
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#2
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Token v6 Guy
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: No longer neon land :(
Posts: 5,703
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WERD!!!!!
Fo shizzle!
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2013 Dodge Challenger SRT8 - 12.079 at 116.45
2010 Ford Taurus SHO - stage 4+ tune and an intake - no times yet
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04-02-2005, 10:19 PM
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#3
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Conshohocken, PA 19428
Posts: 589
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lol so tru
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1985 Pontiac Trans-am
2013 Harley-Davidson Street Glide
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04-02-2005, 10:41 PM
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#4
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14 Second Club
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: RUM$ON, NJ
Posts: 2,308
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Whats wrong with the Monster Tachs?
Also I like the camber one.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by The Fapist
K0ll is a hick and has a veritable fleet of 1980-early 90's GM vehicles :mullet:
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04-03-2005, 10:03 PM
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#5
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Ramsey, NJ
Posts: 1,140
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04-03-2005, 10:14 PM
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#6
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: West Long Branch
Posts: 13,598
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Hey, more Camber means more tires.....
Come to Papa...
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2/20/2013: They Day the ****s Stopped
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04-04-2005, 08:21 AM
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#7
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: border of Union Cnty/Somerset Cnty/Middlesex Cnty.
Posts: 455
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by 79dizZy28
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__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by j0n
monkey/spanky pwn me  |
2003 Tarmac EVO VIII-122ci of 4-bangin fury,
intake/racing(ie catless) 3\" exhaust/HKS 272\'s/21-22lbs/ TurboXS BOV /ACT Clutch/TurboTrix tune / Wallboro(sp) 225 /
335awhp, 307awtq
1994 Formula-bolt-on, geared, programmed, sold
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04-07-2005, 11:12 PM
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#8
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Near Menlo Park New Jersey
Posts: 389
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How about: The engine in the other guy's Bird, developes more torque than it takes to hold the 'Lug Nuts' on your car
Done in bold, so it's easier to read
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04-09-2005, 09:58 AM
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#9
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Brick, NJ
Posts: 277
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i like the camber one, the spoiler one and the dying moose..also most imports are 77 or 87 Ibs of torque on those lug nuts...lol and the horsepower per cylinder wasn't mentioned...that is the first thing that comes out of there mouth....how many horsepower per cylinder do you have? remember....just shake your head and laugh....
__________________
1991 Trans Am Convertible black on tan leather 5.0 5spd, Ram Air hood, Hawks Light bar, Ronal Firehawk wheels, D1SC waiting to go on, all suspension work done and 1le brakes
1980 Ducati Darmah 12:1 arias pistons, 88mm cylinders, 44mm intake 40mm exhaust valves, Imola cam, NCR race exhaust, 40mm intakes, 40mm dellorto carbs, etc
www.myspace.com/onesykgta
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04-09-2005, 07:48 PM
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#10
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Avatar Abuser
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: 08721-1716
Posts: 5,056
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Wasted Youth
how many horsepower per cylinder do you have? remember....just shake your head and laugh....
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they'd be better off with the horsepower/weight ratio. stupid ricers, slicks go on the rear axle.
__________________
JSFBOA
Save a life.
N = R* fp ne fl fi fc L
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04-09-2005, 09:46 PM
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#11
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Near Menlo Park New Jersey
Posts: 389
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by jims69camaro
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Wasted Youth
how many horsepower per cylinder do you have? remember....just shake your head and laugh....
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they'd be better off with the horsepower/weight ratio. Â*stupid ricers, slicks go on the rear axle. |
Hey, if you get high enough up into the horsepower range, who cares what it weighs, just start worrying about stopping and steering 
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